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Growing up can be a challenging time for any adolescent. Intrusive thoughts, self-doubt and low-self esteem can be familiar feelings when forming your identity. Now imagine adding the pressures of those from ethnic minority groups, feelings of alienation, language barriers, cultural differences and even before all of that, before you utter a word, your appearance says it all. According to a study Documenting Portrayals of Race/Ethnicity on Primetime Television, by sociologists Riva Tukachinsky and Dana Mastro, “those with low self-concept lack engagement in life-sustaining activities, from the simplest of things such as giving an opinion, socialising, dating or going to work.”

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While London is one of the most diverse capitals in the world, unless you are living in Finchley, chances are you will be one of the few Iranian girls in your school, let alone your class. And chatting to your fellow Arab, Turkish and Indian classmates about similar life issues can be a source of comfort, but it just doesn't hit the same as confiding in your Iranian sis about shared experiences and the ongoing battle of balancing cultures.  

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Relying on collectivism to obtain standards of self esteem 

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Studies by various psychologists such as Hazel Markus, author of Engaging Cultural Differences: The Multicultural Challenge in Liberal Democracies, have shown that one reason why some minority groups may feel more self-doubt than others is due to “different cultural traditions giving rise to different default patterns of behaviour.” Iranians traditionally consider the importance of the group, being from a “collectivist culture,” these socialisations run on culturally valued attributes that promote group harmony, a sense of connectedness, and conformity. Hence the customary tradition called “Taarof,”* a tradition that every Iranain family has come across and is satirised for the nature of its excessive hospitality. While in the UK and other Western countries the “individualistic culture” encourages prioritising the individual. These cultural differences may explain why one could lack self-concept having grown up within an environment that does not suit their cultural ideologies.

 

Instead of internalising these issues of identity, diaspora communities have used storytelling to promote healing, creating communities and connections through shared experiences. Sociologist and author of From Storytelling to Social Change: The Power of Story in the Community Building, Dr Yanu Prasetyo states “In the community development processes, sharing stories or experiences can build trust, cultivate norms, facilitate unlearning, and generate emotional connections.” Not only is storytelling a useful tool for diaspora communities it is also intrinsic to our heritage as Iranians. The former head of the Iran section at the British Foreign & Commonwealth Office and author of Iran: Empire of the Mind, Michael Axworthy, claims throughout history its people have “struggled with identity, fighting stereotypes, politics and social injustices.” The Shahnameh (book of kings, by Ferdowsi, who wrote of folk-memory and poetry), is a great example of how Iran has used storytelling with the intent to preserve culture and tradition of pre-Islamic Iran, for future generations, It is seen as a time capsule for our language and culture that can still be referenced to in modern day Iran.  

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Ziba has collected pages of stories taken from the diaries of strong female Iranians, who were once young girls trying to navigate life in the UK. These stories are shared with the purpose to talk about the unrepresented and create a space of commonality, so that if you do share similar experiences just know you are not alone and you can overcome any situation. To read these stories head over to the GRAB A MAG panel and buy a copy of the latest Ziba issue.      

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*Taarof is the customary back-and-forth of polite gestures and cultural pleasantries used when giving and receiving gifts, food, money, and more. Considered an art form by some, proper use can amaze a Persian audience at best and offend them at worst. Similar to the “who pays the bill” charade in some Western cultures, it is done to show respect, hospitality, reverence for elders, and politeness. - defined by mei.edu